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Synopsis

"Stag night" for Mark in the Vic and Ruth in the Café. Ruth and Pauline find they have something in common, while Tiffany and Bianca find it's a man's world. Sharon is left out in the cold while the rest of the Square enjoy themselves. Mark and Arthur have an emotional talk, and Ruth makes an assurance to Pauline.

Everyone is drinking, buying Mark drinks, and the football team are having a tactics session where they are all making fun of Nigel with his subbuteo showing them the plays. The tactics are to run forward when they have the ball and scores goals, and to run back when they don't have the ball. Grant especially has to run back and forwards, and he says he'll be knackered. Nigel says it's not very far, and they say, not on here, but we're playing on a ruddy great football pitch. Grant has to go to show the stripper the bathroom. She asks Grant what's required? Grant says err, well, get your kit off. She then shocks Grant with her list of possible acts, and he says oh I think just a straight strip. Bianca and Tiffany go to the Vic in suits, Alan comes over to tell them to leave, David says they're only having a bit of fun and buys them drinks.

The football team all take the piss and ignore Nigel, and leave when the stripper comes on while he is still in the middle of his team talk.

Tiffany spends the whole evening chatting David up, and Bianca tells her to stop it as she's embarrassed. Tiff says what jealous? Oh of course you can't.. haha why don't you go and put lover boy out of his misery, he's been staring at you all night (Ricky). Bianca ignores it and sulks a bit. Alan tells Bianca he's leaving and its about time she did. David says he will take her home, Alan says he would rather do it, so Bianca leaves, and says to Tiffany he's all yours now, happy? David doesn't look too happy about it!

Mark gets pissed and starts getting morbid about Jill and that she told him to promise not to lie or be ashamed about being HIV, and he thinks he is by pretending to be a normal bloke having a stag night. He tells Steve this at one point, Steve tells him not to worry about it and he's not lying at all. Sanjay and Phil chat about Ruth and Mark goes on about Ruth not having children, and they assume she's pregnant, Mark says no, but she'd be nice if she were, all "glowy". Nigel agrees, he's been trying to persuade Debbie to have a baby, but she isn't keen! However, Mark waffles on a bit about it and Nigel and Phil take the piss about his incoherence, and don't know what he's going on about, laughing and joking. Arthur takes him to the toilet before he says anything and he throws up etc. Arthur says he told him so.

At Kathy's café the women are having a hen night, Ruth is thinking of Mark and says she'd rather be with him tonight. Pat is moping and tells Kathy about Roy and his offer, etc and she still feels married to Frank and that she's being unfaithful to him by going out with Roy. She goes home early.

Pauline and Michelle discuss Sharon who's stuck at home, Michelle says it's not fair that everyone has turned their back on her. Pauline goes to Kathy and says that Sharon should be there, Kathy says she wont have that bitch here. Pauline thinks about it. A man comes in and Kathy isn't too friendly, he says he's from the council and she was told not to open until the licence comes through. She says its a private party and he says the door was open and he only has her word for that. She says get out or I'll throw you out. So he does. However, they decide to close up anyhow and go to the Vic with the food, etc. They turn up as the stripper is leaving. The stripper asks Grant if he'd like anything else, she still has her whipped cream. Debbie comes up to the bar and asks Grant and Nigel who she was. They get embarrassed and say err the caterer. Debbie says but you didn't have any food. Nigel says err good point, Grant says oh its for a do next week. Debbie says oh I see, I just thought she might be the stripper. Grant and Nigel look at each other.

Ruth goes over to look after Mark, who's recovered slightly. Pauline goes to Sharon's and apologises for not including her in the family, and she's Vicki's half sister, etc. And Pauline says that she will look after her from now on as she promised Angie she would.

Credits

Main cast

  • Todd Carty as Mark
  • Caroline Paterson as Ruth
  • Wendy Richard as Pauline
  • Bill Treacher as Arthur
  • Susan Tully as Michelle
  • David Roper as Geoff
  • Pam St. Clement as Pat
  • Michael French as David
  • Sid Owen as Ricky
  • Patsy Palmer as Bianca
  • Martine McCutheon as Tiffany
  • Ross Kemp as Grant
  • Steve McFadden as Phil
  • Gillian Taylforth as Kathy
  • Adam Woodyatt as Ian
  • Letitia Dean as Sharon
  • Paul Bradley as Nigel
  • Nicola Duffett as Debbie
  • Mona Hammond as Blossom
  • Lindsey Coulson as Carol
  • Howard Antony as Alan
  • Mark Monero as Steve
  • Deepak Verma as Sanjay
  • Shobu Kapoor as Gita
  • Elizabeth Kelly as Nellie
  • Gretchen Franklin as Ethel
  • Fine Time Fontayne as Sid Holliday
  • Gillian Tompkins as Susie Denton
  • Steven Crossley as Mr Dobson
  • Ron Tarr as Big Ron
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